Sirius
by Dr.Iceheart
Summary: They had tried once but it didn't work out and it'd ended badly. Now they found alone just the two of them for the first time outside work. Would they be able to put aside their pride to find a way back to each other?. Two shots.
1. Chapter 1

**Sirius**

**Disclaimer: Jane and Maura don't belong to me. I don't own anything. You can ask my parents.**

**A/N:****This is an idea that had been running in my head for a long time so here it is. I'm new in here and this is actually my very first story so if you are going to criticize please be gentle. Also, english it's not my first language so it there's some mistake, I apologize in advance.**

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They had tried. It was great at the beginning but then it didn't work out. And it'd ended. Badly. And now, aside from work, they hadn't talk to each other in a really long time, had not being alone just the two of them. There was no more beer and wine at the Robber, no more movie nights. Jane would no longer went down to the morgue if there wasn't an autopsy. And Maura had opted for not going upstair, she was the boss after all and could always send an intern to deliver the reports.

They couldn't talk to each other without end it yelling and fighting. The words are knives when they are driven by anger and passions and they always ended up hurting each other and crying after the other one leaves. And both thought that that was all, there was not going back. They were both too proud and stubborn to give the first step.

And even though they still had strong feelings and still love each other like crazy, seen each other was just too much, so if they never have to do it again that was fine.

But destiny, family and friends had other plans in mind, so their paths met again outside the precinct and suddenly they found themselves capable, for the first time, of stand next to each other, without speaking, just enjoying the silence that embrace them, just enjoying the company. They still had a lot of things to say but they were both too tired of argue and neither of them wants to ruin this moment.

It was a silent truce.

They started to sneak a glance here and there when the other one wasn't looking but suddenly they both miscalculated and their eyes met, staying for a while just looking at each other, looking for something to say or a way of get the hell out of there. That, until Maura just closed her eyes and turned her head to look out trough the window.

The silence was starting to get too heavy and Jane felt the need to say something but she didn't know how to start. Luckily, her mouth had a little idea. An easy way.

"Maura." It was soft. Almost imperceptive. She wasn't even sure that Maura had listened her.

"Please don't, Jane." She didn't want to argue. She didn't want to start this discussion again. It was a sweet moment so far. Why she couldn't enjoy it a little longer?

Jane fall silent. But took advantage of the moment fixing her eyes on the doctor. On the tired expressions of her face. The way her eyebrows narrow and formed a sad frown. The way her lips pursed and her jaw clenched . The way her golden curls fell perfectly down her shoulders, exposing just a little part of the long neck -her favourite part to be kissed- and god, she was dying to kiss her.

And suddenly it hit her. How could she let her go? She was everything and she was so, so beautiful. How she let her pride get in the way of their relationship that way? She knew she has to fix this. And she has to do it now. She couldn't lose her. She couldn't resist it. How could she had been so stupid in the first place? How could she'd survive all this time without her? Was was she thinking?

It was time to put aside her pride. She had to get her back. She needed her more than air itself.

"I'm sorry," she tried to say in a strong voice, but instead her tone was shaking. She cleared her throat and started again. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for being an idiot, for not listening to you, for yelling at you. I'm sorry for hurting you. I'm sorry for making you feel that we weren't meant to be. But I can't live without you."

She was speaking fast, really fast. Like afraid that if she stopped she couldn't start again.

Maura had her head down, but Jane needed to feel her, she needed to know that Maura was listening. So tentatively she took both of maura's hands in her own and continued.

"We can start again. I know we can. I know we can be great together, Maur. I know that we can shine, we can be a star in this beautiful sky, the brightest of all. Or we can be the moon, the sun, a whole new galaxy, whatever you want, but together. I don't need anything or anyone else but you. I know that the force that bind us is stronger that you or I can't even begin to imagine and there's nothing in this world that hurts me more that being without you, Maur. Please."

Maura just stood there, in silence looking at her shoes. She couldn't look at Jane. Suddenly she begins to tremble. Jane take her chin softly and raise her head, noting that her eyes were wet, but the answer she was looking for was in there. In the shine of her eyes, in the expression of her face, in her accelerated heartbeat, in the strength and tenderness of the squeeze that Maura give to her hands.

She raised her left hand and with her thumb remove the lonely tear that was running down Maura's cheek without taking her eyes away from her face and whispered. "I love you."

"Sirius," responded Maura, smiling.

Jane stare at her confused. She just put her whole heart in her hands, and Maura knew how hard that was for her. What was she talking about?

"What?"

"Sirius is the brightest star in the night sky. You said something about the force that bind us. Sirius is a binary star, they are actually two stars orbiting around a common center of mass and they are bound by a gravitational pull so strong that it's almost impossible separate them," she was rambling but she couldn't stop. Jane just stare at her smiling, so she keep speaking, "They are actually so close to each other that they evolution like one, but reach states that one single star could never…"

Jane was listening carefully but she knew that Maura was so nervous that would never stop speaking if Jane didn't stop her. So taking her face with both hands she close the distance between them and kissed her softly.

It just lasted a couple of seconds but they both felt like it had been a year. They've been waiting so long for this that neither of them want it to end. When the kiss ended they were incapable of move away, so they stay with their foreheads together and their eyes still closed. Breathing the same air. Feeling each other. Tasting the moment.

And this time it was Maura who whispered, "I love you."

Jane just smiled, opened her eyes and look for the hazel eyes of the beautiful woman in front of her, "Sirius".

And both knew that this wasn't all, they still had a lot to talk. But it was a start. And that was enough.

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**A/N 2:** **I hope you enjoy it and if you like it let me know :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Sirius Ch2**

**A/N: Continue this story was never something I intended to do. Even in the summary says it was just one shot but my stupid self forgot to mark it as complete and many of you follow it so I tried my best to give you this even though I'm not so sure about it. ****I really hope you like it.**

_**Disclaimers are in chapter 1.**_

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They were still standing in the same place. Hugging each other and extending the moment. Nothing had ended yet and nothing had begun either. They were trapped in a transition process. They had to talk. But not yet.

"What do you wanna do now?," asked Jane pulling away her face that was still in Maura's shoulder smelling the sweet aroma of her hair. She really had missed that smell, feeling it from far away wasn't the same.

"I just want to go home", the doctor whispered, looking at the beautiful dark eyes in front of her.

Jane look at her surprised, maybe a little disappointed, but she didn't want Maura to notice it. "Oh.. okay. I'll walk you to your car then".

Maura's face fell and she looked down trying to hide the disappointment, but unlike to her partner, her efforts were vain. Jane noticed it immediately. "Hey what's wrong?" But she didn't answer, so Jane once again was obligated to take delicately her chin between her fingers and raised it up with her hand, "Maura, sweetie, look at me. What's wrong?," she asked softly.

"Nothing, I just.." She stopped, why she'd stopped? Was it bad? She'd begun to regret this already? Jane was scared. Maura just shook her head and started again, "When I said that I wanted to go home I meant with you, I just want to go home with you. But if you have something else to do-"

"No!" Jane responded, but it was way too quickly and the expression in Maura's face indicated that she had misunderstood, "I mean no, I don't have anything else to do.. and even if I had to, I'll still go with you. You know that." And Maura smiled. Yes, she did know that. "Just let me go grab my things"

She turned around and started walking to do what she had said but then went running back to Maura and gave her a quick kiss on her lips, "I'll be right back."

And Maura smiled again. God, the muscles on her face had really miss that sensation.

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Now they were cuddling on the sofá at Maura's house in front of the fireplace. Maura was resting her head on the crook of jane's neck with both of her hands on the detective; one in her back and the other one on her chest feeling her quiet beat of her heart while Jane had her right arm around the doctor's shoulder and her left one above Maura's hand on her chest.

Neither was talking. Even though they really -really- need to talk, they didn't want to. At least not yet. What if this didn't work again? They had to enjoy every second of peace while they still could.

Neither of them knew how much time had passed until Maura dared to broke the silence.

"My first intentional word was when I was 5 months old." It was quiet, soft.

"Hm?" Jane was almost falling asleep when she heard her but she wasn't sure what had she heard.

"I said my first intentional word when I was barely 5 months old and by the time of my third birthday I was able to speak fluently like a much older kid." Jane was wide awake now but it still a little confused. _Where was this heading?_

"When I was in boarding school and the teachers ask us to write essays about something I always got the highest marks because of my wide knowledge of language. I've never had problems with words before. True, I've never been good speaking to people, not even to my parents, but that never happened with you…" _Oh, that was something. Now it was making a little sense._

"I was always correcting you, always speaking and explaining things with words that makes you look at me with an expression that made me feel like suddenly I had grew a new head. I never though that something like this could happened to us." She still had her head on Jane's shoulder and was taking advantage that she couldn't see her face to let go every thing she was thinking. Every thing she was feeling.

"I used to think that it was kind of ironic that it was precisely my bad use of words and miscommunication what made me a lonely person. I've never had friends, not even in boarding school when I was 24/7 with the same girls. When someone talked to me it was almost always to make fun of me or to get something. And it was a little sad but deep inside I realized that it didn't really mattered, I was used to being alone anyway so it didn't hurt me so bad. But you.." Here it comes, thought Jane. She knew this was going to hurt. She knew that after this she would regret so many things.. "God, Jane. I swear I've never felt an emotional pain like that before. I never thought that it would be the words that would make me lose the only person I ever truly care for, the only person I ever truly love."

It wasn't much about why they were always fighting because actually it wasn't for anything in particular. It were just little and stupid things. And at the beginning it wasn't that bad, but then the fights were starting to become something usual and their words were becoming so hurtful. And neither of them knew why but suddenly they found each other yelling things that weren't meant to say, but they realized about it too late and they were both too stubborn to take it back.

It wasn't one big fight, it were a lot of little fights. And everytime they tried to solve an old one they ended creating a new one. So they started to add and add little fights until it all came to a point where they were incapable of solve anything because neither of them actually remembered why they had started in the first place.

Their problem wasn't that they weren't capable of being together, it was that they weren't capable of communicate with each other. And they never had that problem before. That's why they were so taken aback when it happened.

"You didn't lose me. You could never lose me," Jane tried to say, but Maura continued speaking like she hadn't heard her.

"You have no idea how hard it was for me just stay at the morgue all day praying to not be called to a crime scene because I knew that I would have to see you there. Don't get me wrong, I loved – love – seeing you, but it hurt. We reached a point where I just couldn't see you anymore because just looking at you hurt." There was a little moment of silence while Maura was trying to decide how to continue while Jane was trying to process what she was hearing without crying.

Maura sighed heavily, kind of sad, "The mind it's a powerful thing. And I read somewhere that when you got something that hurts you should ignore it until it stop hurting. That was what I tried to do, that's why I ended up ignoring you, I was just trying -and failing miserably - to forget you." Now she was the one that was trying to hold back her tears. She had to finish what she was saying, she had to get everything out. She continued speaking softly, "So I came to the conclusion that I was going to want to see you again the day that I would be able to look at your face without feeling disappointed or nostalgic or angry, the day that I would be able to smile at you and tell you how happy I am that you are not longer part of my life, the day that I could tell you 'take care' and leave without any regrets for letting you go. I was going to choose see you again the day that I didn't die inside to meet you again after you leave." Jane gulped hard. _That's why they had meet? That's why Maura chose see her? Had she been successful?_

"I was so stupid. Of course, that day never came. And I don't think it would ever come. My worse day with you would still be much better that my best day without you."

She breathed relieved. But now she didn't know what to say. There were just a handful of thing that were capable of leave her speechless, but Maura was the only one that did it successfully every time.

"I'm sorry for making you feel that way. I…" She begun, but didn't know how to continue. She actually didn't like talking about herself, even less about her feelings, but she knew that if they wanted to do this they had to do it right. No more staying silent. No more keeping it all inside. She knew that Maura wouldn't feel pity for her, so she didn't need to hide anything. Jane Rizzoli was going to left her shield and tough self aside.

Softly, she took Maura's shoulder and pulled her away. She needed to see her face. With a sigh she begun, "I do have an idea of what you feel. I know because it was almost the same for me. I don't know how to even begin to explain how hard it was for me to look at you in those ridiculously tight dresses that you choose to wear and not be able to touch you. It hurt me a little more everytime that you let us know that you finished a report but then, instead of hearing your heels after the ding of the elevator, I heard the hard footsteps of one of the interns you send as your replacement. I never though that someone could miss a sound, but god, you have no idea how much I missed the click of your heels." Maura let her lips form a little smile, but Jane continued speaking with a serious face, "I missed you. All of you. And even when I was completely mad at you for any thing, you were the first person I tried to tell something exciting that happened, the first person that I looked for when I arrived to an scene, the first person I looked when someone else said something funny just to check if you were laughing, just to see if, maybe.." She looked down, trying to hide the sad expression of her face, "if maybe you were doing it much better than me."

"I wasn't." Maura said, looking down too. Now their foreheads were together and they were, once again, breathing the same air that surround them.

"No, you weren't." Jane repeated, now lifting Maura's gaze and hers with the movement of her head.

They stay silence for a while just looking each other's eyes. _When did they get here?_

"Why we did this to ourselves?," asked Maura. Her face was hard to interpret, was she mad? Was she sorry? Jane didn't really understand what she was referring to and Maura noticed it, so she clarified, "why did we hurt each other so much? At one moment everything was perfect and at the next one we were yelling like if we hated each others, when did we let all this get out of our hands?"

And could Jane say if she didn't know either?

"I don't know," she say firmly.

Maura looked at her surprised by her tone, uncertain. Where did that force came from? But then her expression change to one of pity.. pity? Of them? Of their relationship? Of no having answers? She looked down again and shook her head. No, it wasn't pity.

But Jane saw the movement and misinterpreted it. She thought –once again- that Maura was starting to regret this conversation, this second chance. She had to avoid that.

She took the doctor's hands between hers and start talking with certainty, with the same force than before, "I don't know how or when did we get here but we did it. We let ourselves go and let that little things interfere between us. But we already know how it is to be apart. I can't. I can't be away from you." She let go of her hands and raised them to take her face and look for her gaze. She had to convince Maura of what she was talking about.

"I believe in us. Even my mother believe in us. She made me feel guilty about not going to Sunday dinners to her house anymore just because I didn't want to find you there. And apparently she allied with Frankie, Korsak and Frost to help her until their strategy worked and we found each other there, so I'm pretty sure they did the same with you." Maura chuckled, that was exactly what Angela and the guys had done with her too. Even Susie participated.

"People believe in us, Maur. And I know you do too, if not we wouldn't be here now. Please give us another chance. We just have to be careful to not make the same mistakes again. We just have to talk more with each other. But we can do this. Can we try again? I need you back."

She was begging now. Jane Rizzoli didn't beg. This was just a proof of how far she was willing to go for this beautiful woman.

Maura smiled and raised her hand to caress Jane's cheek, "You really don't realize it yet. Don't you?"

"Realize of what?," she asked with a little insecurity. She still was scared of rejection.

Maura just smiled wider, "You got me back at the moment you mentioned the stars' analogy. And – honestly - after all you said there's no way I'll ever let you go again."

Now Jane smiled too, finally relieved. Maura was hers again and viceversa. And there's nothing in this world she wouldn't do to protect her and keep her by her side.

Maura move her face forward and slowly closed he small distance between them to capture Jane's lips between hers in a soft but firm kiss to which Jane responded immediately. It wasn't rushed. It was sweet and it tasted like hope. It was like going back home.

They moved her arms so now Maura was grabbing Jane's neck with her left hand and the right one was still resting on her cheek while both of Jane's were now around the blonde's waist to bring her closer. If that was even possible.

They couldn't only hear, now they could also feel the mixed sound of their accelerated heartbeats. And even though they had kissed just a little while before, it was like the first time. It was their new beginning. It was their new chance.

"Now it's sealed." Jane said softly when they pull away. The intensity of the kiss had let them both breathing hard.

Maura smiled, gently caressing Jane's lips with her thumb. And tried to convey all her love in the words she spoke next with the sweetest tone she could find.

"Now we are Sirius."

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**A/N 2:** **Again I hope you enjoy it and if you like it please let me know :)**


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